Solution for crowd control at football games

Back in 2003, fourth-division Steaua Nicolae Balcescu found themselves in a quandary: Romanian leagues chiefs were threatening the club with expulsion following a series of pitch invasions and violent outbreaks. What was the club to do? Perimeter fencing? Increased stewarding? Not quite.

Chairman Alexandra Cringus came up with the 'innovative' concept of creating a moat surrounding the pitch, packed with fully-grown crocodiles. "This is not a joke," insisted Cringus. "We can get crocodiles easy enough and feed them on meat from the local abattoir. The ditch is planned to be wide enough that no one could manage to jump over it. Anyone who attempted to do so would have to deal with the crocs. I think that the problem of fans running on to the pitch will be solved once and for all." You don't say.

And what of players tumbling off the field and into the watering hole? Cringus planned to create the moat far enough from the pitch in order to prevent said calamity, yet not forgetting about the crocs; electric pipes were to be installed in the water as to keep it heated during cold weather. The last we heard of the tale was that local authorities were considering the club's proposal.