Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Sanitized for your amusement

Amnesiac had a good post about some of the ludicrous translations that appear on Nile TV. Well, things aren't much better in the US..


According to FamilyMediaGuide.com, the Coen brothers' 1998 comedy The Big Lebowski is one of the most profane movies of all time, with 260 recorded uses of the word fuck. The potty-mouthed exchanges present a challenge to network censors, whose solutions often border on the bizarre. Here are some of the best (otherwise known as the worst) family-friendly overdubs:

Original Line: They peed on my fucking rug
TV version: They peed on my valued rug

Original Line: If you don't like my fucking music, get your own fucking cab..outta my fucking cab!
TV version:If you don't like my peaceful music, get your own cab...outta my peaceful cab!

Original Line: Fuck you and your bullshit!
TV Line: Forget you and your bull!

Original: Tomorrow, we come back and cut off your Johnson!
TV version: Tomorrow, we come back and we cut off your toes!

Original Line: Are you ready to be fucked, man?
TV version: Are you ready to be plucked, man?

Original Line: I'll suck your cock for a thousand dollar.
TV version: I'll slurp your coke for a thousand dollars.

Original: This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!
TV version: This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps and feed him scrambled eggs!

2 Comments:

Blogger Amnesiac said...

But...why??

I mean is this at all times of day across all networks?

Don't people complain or do they not give a truck?

6:10 PM  
Blogger Basil Fawlty said...

See, the US is a post-puritan culture, that keeps lapsing back. You really need to see the Kirby Dick documentary about movie censorship called 'This Film is Not Yet Rated' to understand how the powers that control issues of censorship are actually a) self-appointed b) not afffiliated to the government and c) malevolently secretive.

Answer to your question: Yes, it doesn't get any better late at night. Network TV is a joke. People who want to watch the Big Lebowski, won't watch it on friggin' TNT.

6:21 PM  

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