Everton FC 3 Liverpool 0

I'm an Everton fan. Last week, they destroyed Liverpool in the 'Merseyside Derby', so-named because it pits the two main teams from the city of Liverpool in North England. This match report is taken from the Everton fan website When Skies Are Grey. It's a thing of beauty, partly because it's completely biased and partly because Everton have a history of perrenial under-achievement, especially compared to their much more successful neighbors. I've always gravitated to the underdog and they don't come anymore underdog-gy than Everton. Enjoy the partisan piece and the really great photos.


By mark o'brien
Date: 11/9/2006

Is there even any point doing a report on this game? It's not like you haven't seen the highlights a hundred times already.

And you're probably going to get your hair cut on Monday, just so you can read all the papers. Again.

Everton thoroughly deserved their win. You don't fluke a three-nil victory, despite all the shite that we will undoubtedly read and hear from the usual people.

The fact of the matter is, that for all Liverpool's progress under Rafael Benitez, they started they derby with the washed up Robbie Fowler partnering the hopeless Peter Crouch. Everton, for their part, had the brilliant Andy Johnson.

We've been on the end of some horrible results in these fixtures recently, with Liverpool more or less strolling to victory in some of them. It was clear from the outset here though that David Moyes and his players were in no mood for a repeat. Wary of Liverpool's strength in midfield, Phil Neville was moved back in there alongside Lee Carsley, and the ex-Manchester United man, who played fullback for England in midweek, gave an immense, captain's performance.

With Johnson occupying the visitors' defence on his own, Everton's five man midfield were able to compete with Liverpool's, and the Reds quickly resorted to a very direct approach. The high balls toward Crouch were easily dealt with though by Joseph Yobo and Joleon Lescott - as impressive a central defensive pairing as there is around at the moment - and the outstanding Tim Howard, who came and claimed everything. It will be a shame if the Blues aren't able to work out a deal with United to make the American's stay permanent at the end of the season.

The opening goal, scored on 23 minutes, came from nowhere. The game was just starting to settle down after the typically feisty opening, when Mikel Arteta's cross was flicked on by Carsley and found Cahill unmarked on the edge of the six-yard-box, from where he slotted under Jose Reina - more of him later.

Howard then made a great save from Luis Garcia, and Steven Gerrard, who was rendered pretty ineffectual, stuck out wide, could only turn the rebound onto the post. The England midfielder also flashed a shot narrowly wide from the edge of the box on one of the rare occasions that the Everton midfield granted him any space.

On 35 minutes though, it was Everton who scored again. Johnson's pace and persistence unnerved Sami Hyypia and Jamie Carragher throughout the game, and when they got mixed up and the England centre-half mis-kicked his clearance, Johnson stole in and picked his spot just inside Reina's near post.

When do Everton go in at half time in the derby two-nil up?


A Liverpool goal might have unsettled the Blues, and the visitors did look more threatening when they replaced Crouch with Dirk Kuyt, but for all their possession after the break they rarely looked that dangerous.

Gerrard did strike a post from close range, and Steve Finnan dragged a shot narrowly wide from the edge of the box - oh, and apparently they should have had about thirty-eight penalties as well, because obviously they don't get enough out of Graham Poll as it is. Seriously though, if they think that side did enough to win a derby - and to be fair, a lot of them don't - then they are even more delusional than we suspected.

Any slim hope of a comeback for Liverpool was quashed when substitute John Arne Riise did himself, Steve McMahon style, while cynically hacking down Arteta. The Norwegian was stretchered off and they were left with only ten men after using all three subs. Special mention should go to one of them, Jermain Pennant, whose mere presence provoked the ire of one Cockney sat in front of us. Presumably he was a Spurs fan watching the game with his mate, as he never said a dicky bird until the aforementioned winger started warming up. At that point he turned into Ben Kinglsey in sexy Beast.

"You cant Pennant. You fackin' jailbird cant."

And, quite memorably, "Your mavver's a fackin' braaaaarse Pennant."


But anyway. As Liverpool tried in vain to push for a breakthrough, the Blues stretched them and the fans got greedy, knowing that we haven't beaten them by three goals during most of our lifetimes. Johnson should have scored with a diving header after great work by Leon Osman, and Gary Naysmith fired wildly over in the dying minutes of normal time.

Any sense of disappointment vanished though with the highlight of a day when the Evertonians got some tiny measure of payback for all the shite we've had to endure at their hands down the years.

Carsley's long range curler in the final minute of injury time looked easy for Reina to deal with. However, the Spaniard pushed it up into the air and saw it dropping into his goal. He had enough time to backtrack though, but as he caught the ball he was in danger of carrying it into the net with him. With a sense of genuine comedy timing, he tossed it over his shoulder, bouncing it straight onto the inrushing Johnson's head and back into the roof of the net.

Laughing at them in the derby. Not since Steve McManaman and Karl Heinze Reidle tackled each other in front of an empty net during the Cadamarteri game have we seen anything quite so hilarious.

First Spurs, now this. Everton, truly the gear at the moment.