Sunday, September 23, 2007

Congestion


Who am I kidding? The problem is that I've sold out and I'm doing things for the money. And now that the money isn't enough to cover my ever-expanding neuroses, I'm forced to face myself and wonder why it is I've done so little.

Fact: I hate advertising pharmaceuticals. I'm only moderately annoyed by consumer advertising but, because I have a real talent for it and a wealth of experience doing it, it doesn't bother me as much.

Fact: I wouldn't mind being poor if I was doing something I truly loved. Because I'm doing something that annoys me, the need for money is magnified and takes on the signifance of being the only measure of progress I have: more money means even though my life sucks, at least I'm raking it in.

Fact: when you sell out, you use money to cover your anxieties, rather than dealing with them. I hate myself. And that's not your typical Basil moment of self-flagellation. I hate myself because I'm a slave and I made myself that way.

Fact: if change is going to happen, it has to happen now. I don't have any more time (or excuses) to give things a few months. I fucking hate this job, I fucking hate selling myself short and I fucking hate that I allowed myself to get this far.

9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

So, how's your Ramadan going?
-Benoit

12:08 AM  
Blogger Basil Fawlty said...

It's crap, thank you for asking, Benoit.

4:40 AM  
Blogger Jade said...

Basil,

You shall be a slave as long as you are wroking for someone - no matter what you do - you can be doing something you really love but that doesnt mean that you are off the hook!

Take it easy man... & think your options through... good luck starting your own thing.

5:42 AM  
Blogger ZeRoCoOl said...

Basil,

pharmaceuticals:

a sick industry that is all about profit$$$$ I did my undergrad in pharmacy…....yes that degree has 0 personal growth and all cash$$$ it's the undergrad equivalent of being in the NBA. In that industry in general money is plentiful--but that's just about it...After the pad in tribecca and the lifestyle of belinis and empty conversations got tedious. I decided to take a pay-cut 0$. and go to med-school, best decision I ever made. And yes I'm a shit paid resident making in a month what my sister grosses in 3 hours in her pharmacy....BUT I'm happy...

PS. You’re one of a few 800 lb talented verbal gorillas, that blog in the angloarab webisphere. I’m sure you will carve a path for yourself.


Goodluck,

Verbal Shrew.

6:51 AM  
Blogger Portia said...

look at the bright side...you could be me, doing a job you hate, and making no money...luckily, i have enough delusion to be ok with that.

cheers, happy ramadan, i fasted yesterday and had iftar on Steinway. It made the food taste that much better.

Miss ya

10:11 AM  
Blogger TeacherLady said...

What are your options?

10:38 AM  
Blogger Basil Fawlty said...

Well, I'm going to quit this job as soon as humanly possible. I really can't stand it.

In the meantime, I've started shopping my book around and hopefully, someone will bite soon. I'm looking for a 15% increase in salary, which means I'll ask for 25%. And only from a consumer agency.

If that doesn't work out, I'll stay until February, recoup some of my losses and then consider leaving this place.

11:05 AM  
Blogger ZeRoCoOl said...

goodluck with the book..


PS. home was a filing cabinet for widows and young professionals....yes I am jack :D

11:37 AM  
Blogger Basil Fawlty said...

Thanks, ZC. My book isn't a book in the sense that I've written one and hoping to get it published. Just what ad people call their portfolios (in my case, writing samples from ads I've worked on).

12:27 PM  

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