Return of the Mack

The Face-man cometh! After an absence of nine months, he's back for a brief sojourn where he will, in no particular order, attempt to be set up with a 29 year old Pakistani chick his family introduced him to, interview with a view to making his comeback to New York and shop for more cowboy boots than it is humanly possible to wear in a lifetime. He bought three today, already.

It was good to see him, as he regaled me with hilarious tales of his social and romantic ineptitude which somehow always wind up with him partaking of some exceptional, though admittedly infrequent, booty. He's the Forrest Gump of courtship, the Don Quixote of romance, the accidental hero of all that is carnal and lustful. His approach to coitus is baffling in that it is both effective yet guile-free, offensive yet not without it's own charm, a comedy of errors, a picasso of poor form, the man goes where no man thought it would be possible to go without being ostracized for life. For instance, he won't go down on a woman. To counter that, he's got no refractory period and there isn't an unkind bone in his body.

A while back, I realized I was jealous of him. At first, I thought it was because he's a good looking guy, with a family who embrace him, money and has the adulation of women..but that's why. At least, there's more to it than that.

He's so simple and straight-forward, seemingly unfettered by any emotional baggage and completely untroubled by any existential doubt. The man simply has no demons. This simplicity of purpose and outlook is foremost in the list of his charismatic traits. People (read: women) respond to this with limitless affection.

I wish I were simple, but the fact is, I'm not. I have more baggage than an airport terminal and enough demons to start my own hell. His approach, while drawing people to him, also means that it takes a lot less to make him happy. Doubtless, the fact that he doesn't write a blog dedicated to recording every minutae of his daily agonies contributes to his ability to get past the crappiness one runs into throughout life.

Yep, it's good to see him..but I'm still jealous of him.